In the 70's, the legal drinking age was 18. This allowed a lot of us to move the party from our cars to the bars (cruisin' & boozin' was a big pastime back in the day). Many of us would gather at the local college parking lot across the street from high school and spend many hours there sipping on our beverage of choice, while letting the music play from a number of memorable vehicles and sound systems. Some of us who hung out there regularly actually developed a very good reputation with the local police as a responsible crowd. We were a little loud sometimes, but this particular location was isolated enough so that we never really bothered anyone.
As we moved to the bars, there were many opportunities to meet women who wanted to party and play. I remember a song from back then that was popular...."Lookin' for Love in All the Wrong Places," and I did my share of that. Years later after I was saved, I remember looking back and realizing just how true that ballad was. A lot of the music I used to listen to actually had very good "love lyrics".....& God used it all....not a crumb was wasted.
As we moved to the bars, there were many opportunities to meet women who wanted to party and play. I remember a song from back then that was popular...."Lookin' for Love in All the Wrong Places," and I did my share of that. Years later after I was saved, I remember looking back and realizing just how true that ballad was. A lot of the music I used to listen to actually had very good "love lyrics".....& God used it all....not a crumb was wasted.
Finding true love was a very, very big deal to me. I think I got stuck looking for it so intently because it was somewhat lacking in my earlier years. By this time, I had had my heart broken by a girl who I originally thought may just be my life partner. Here again, I found out in the end that she was just another one of the fair-weather type friends that I had gotten mixed up with in the past. I stayed dedicated and faithful, but she did not. A very hard and painful lesson to learn, but God always uses the not-so-good things of life to teach us the most valuable ones.
In April 1977, I met my wife-to-be (Helene) at one of the local popular clubs. She was with a group of her friends, and I spotted her from a distance. I don't know if it was love at first sight, but I just knew I had to go over and introduce myself to this girl! Right from the start, she was different from anyone else I had ever met. We soon came to find out that we had a lot in common and we enjoyed each other's company. Long story short, this started a 2 1/2 year relationship, and we were married in Oct. 1979.
I'm just skimming the surface where details are concerned, but suffice to say that one of the major pitfalls of being the last son at home with an old-fashioned Italian mother is that she will hang onto you for dear life....like a life preserver. Her whole life had been her kids, and she was not prepared for the empty nest. In her mind, it was our job (one, or a combination of all of us) to take care of her, meet her needs, and so on. She looked upon Helene as the one who was stealing me away, and this obviously caused friction between all of us, and Helene could never get real close to her because of it. One thing about Helene that always told me she was the one that God ordained for me.....she never denied my mom a place in our lives. No matter what kind of grief she put up with (and she put up with a lot), she always encouraged me to regularly visit or call her, to always include her....not exclude her. There was no "fair-weather" behavior in her character. Her loyalty and dedication moved me in a way that I cannot describe in words. I would soon come to see that this was a picture of God's character, and she would be the main catalyst in my eventually coming to know the Lord.
During the 2 1/2 years that we dated, I became quite close to Helene's parents. I clearly remember the first time I came to her house. I knocked on the door and her father answered. I introduced myself and shook his hand, and came it to sit and chat with him and her mom. Later, I found out that this just impressed their socks off. Some of the guys she had previously dated were they type who just pulled up out front and honked the horn.....no knock on the door.....no introduction.....no respect.....nothing. This was her dad's major pet peeve, and I had blown all that out of the water. In addition to that, her father was a car buff and loved to tinker and do his own repairs. Well....I was a motor-head, and I worked around cars and car parts everyday. That first night we got into a great conversation about older Chevy's & Ford's and so on. And....her mom thought I was one hot Italian, so I was in her good graces too!! LOL!
Again, God used everything. He would even fill in some of my missing pieces with this new family....more on that later.
In April 1977, I met my wife-to-be (Helene) at one of the local popular clubs. She was with a group of her friends, and I spotted her from a distance. I don't know if it was love at first sight, but I just knew I had to go over and introduce myself to this girl! Right from the start, she was different from anyone else I had ever met. We soon came to find out that we had a lot in common and we enjoyed each other's company. Long story short, this started a 2 1/2 year relationship, and we were married in Oct. 1979.
I'm just skimming the surface where details are concerned, but suffice to say that one of the major pitfalls of being the last son at home with an old-fashioned Italian mother is that she will hang onto you for dear life....like a life preserver. Her whole life had been her kids, and she was not prepared for the empty nest. In her mind, it was our job (one, or a combination of all of us) to take care of her, meet her needs, and so on. She looked upon Helene as the one who was stealing me away, and this obviously caused friction between all of us, and Helene could never get real close to her because of it. One thing about Helene that always told me she was the one that God ordained for me.....she never denied my mom a place in our lives. No matter what kind of grief she put up with (and she put up with a lot), she always encouraged me to regularly visit or call her, to always include her....not exclude her. There was no "fair-weather" behavior in her character. Her loyalty and dedication moved me in a way that I cannot describe in words. I would soon come to see that this was a picture of God's character, and she would be the main catalyst in my eventually coming to know the Lord.
During the 2 1/2 years that we dated, I became quite close to Helene's parents. I clearly remember the first time I came to her house. I knocked on the door and her father answered. I introduced myself and shook his hand, and came it to sit and chat with him and her mom. Later, I found out that this just impressed their socks off. Some of the guys she had previously dated were they type who just pulled up out front and honked the horn.....no knock on the door.....no introduction.....no respect.....nothing. This was her dad's major pet peeve, and I had blown all that out of the water. In addition to that, her father was a car buff and loved to tinker and do his own repairs. Well....I was a motor-head, and I worked around cars and car parts everyday. That first night we got into a great conversation about older Chevy's & Ford's and so on. And....her mom thought I was one hot Italian, so I was in her good graces too!! LOL!
Again, God used everything. He would even fill in some of my missing pieces with this new family....more on that later.
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